Horny Mustangs & Musical Tuesday

On Saturday I found myself in the redneck purgatory known as Walmart, perusing the toy section with my kids. It didn't matter that D had received umpteen-million carefully-selected and pricey new toys for Christmas because he had also received a crisp $5 bill, which was burning a hole in his little pocket. He sat in the front of the cart waving the bill in the air like a flag on an explorer's canoe, as if we were navigating a vast, uncharted wilderness.

It is exceedingly difficult to find a toy that is exactly $5.00 in Walmart. While D searched among the disorganized post-holiday shelves and mumbled something about Darth Vader's light saber I wandered further down the aisle to the clearance section, and that's where I saw this:



I snorted and fumbled for my cell phone. Oh, he's wild, alright. How I longed to turn that mare around in the box and make this officially "found porn," but instead I just took a photo for you, my lovely readers. You see, I am always thinking of you.

When I had finished documenting the unintentional hilarity of the Wild Mustang almost-gang-bang I escorted my children to the check-out so that D could purchase his Han Solo action figure with bonus Storm Trooper disguise, and yes, I had to lend him two bucks to make that happen. Fuckin' expensive toys.

So it's Tuesday and my in-laws are at my house right now, drinking coffee in their PJs. Happily, I am not; I'm working today in my quiet office while my boss is on vacation in Florida and my crazy coworker is holed up at her house because it's -10 degrees out and she is old. Life is good on days like these, although I've been feeling so groggy lately and I just don't know why. It's like I'm underwater for half the day. I'm having trouble finding the funny, I'm not picking up on good movie/music quotes that I know like the back of my hand, and I'm feeling pudgy and fugly after all the holiday binging.

In short, I don't know what I need, but I need something!

I have been listening to lots of good tunes lately, though. I cannot get enough of these three songs:

Not Big by Lily Allen

I just love how Lily's voice sounds so sweet and girlish (not to mention her killer accent!) but she's SO f'ing harsh! Just do me a favor -- listen to this (NSFW) song and try to tell me that it doesn't ROCK. Note: I won't believe you.



Lisztomania by Phoenix:

Funky.



You and I by Wilco (hi Shannon!) with Feist.

Sweet.



So there you have it. Go forth and download. Tell 'em Bev sent ya'.

Have a good day!