Schweddy Balls

We had our little work holiday potluck & Yankee Swap today. Well, it used to be called the Holiday Party out of respect for my boss, who is Jewish, even though the rest of us celebrate Christmas. Of course, he never comes to said Holiday Party because he goes on vacation, but we still kept it PC and called it the Holiday Party. Now, we have a new staff member who is a Jehovah's Witness, so we have to be even more PC, so now we call it the December Potluck. No, we don't have potlucks for the other 11 months of the year, but that's beside the point.

Aaaaanyway. Someone brought in Rum balls. I immediately started my "Schweddy Balls" routine, because, as you know, it's what I do. Pop culture reference? Yeah, I got that.

A disappointing handful of my boring coworkers got the Schweddy balls reference.

Now, these balls. Wowza. You could smell the rum before you even brought it to your lips; the things were heavy with it. They were like rum-sodden donut holes. I restrained myself and had just two, but the food and the merriment, etc. all combined to make me feel more than a little sassy. To make this clear: I WAS NOT DRUNK FROM THE TWO SCHWEDDY BALLS. Bitch, please. My tolerance is not that low.

So I'm getting a little goofy with my stiff ol' coworkers, and we're having a good time, and suddenly everyone is looking at me like I'm the "new Beverly" and saying stuff about how the rum balls must be kicking in because Beverly is soooo funny! Yadda yadda yadda... it must be the booze. (this is me rolling my eyes)

I tried to explain as nicely as possible that THIS is closer to the real Beverly than they've ever been allowed to get before now. The person who sits at my desk every day and listens to their idiotic complaints is the watered-down, dead-eyed version of a pretty FUN person. I typically check my personality at the door.

Bottom line: I've worked here for 5 years, and no one knows me at all.

Well, except Joe, who did vouch for me by saying that whenever we go out with our spouses, I'm a riot. :) Thanks, Broseph.

Back at my desk just now, one of the guys just brought over another rum ball and said that they had all voted and decided I should have another. Hardy har har.

** sigh ** They still think the rum made me silly, when, in fact, God did that. ;)

BAH! Humbug. Here's Alec Baldwin & his Shweddy Balls: